Let Me Know
by IceCloak
Summary: Ben Burnley leaves her confused out of her mind. . Ben x OC
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer : Benjamin Burnley is in no way in the real world my property. . and now that I've said it, I shall go and weep in the corner. . **

* * *

... and he pulled away.

Without any explanation what so ever, he turned around and walked as if that moment had ceased to exist. In that case, I can damn well pretend it was nothing as well. I walked back into the hall and joined with my friends and everything was plain normal. Except the fact that he avoided my eye as if his life depended upon it, and the fact that Melissa was no where to be seen.

My mind was buzzing and I was a total mess inside. I was never good dealing with emotions; and to have one particular emotion turn my entire world upside down was devastating. I didn't know what to do. Talking with my girls didn't help. Drinking wine like water did nothing to my nerves. My heart was hammering away and my mind - never mind. . .

Logic and Emotion are the worst ever cock-tails. . . I decided to lamely focus on this idea rather than facing what had happened. And it's frustrating when emotion is louder than your logic. However you try to convince yourself on every base idea that surfaces to your mind in that instance, a hard wrench in your stomach is enough to dissolve the thought. My mind kept replaying the scene over and over again and the over whelming confusion swept over me, so much that I just wanted to sink to the floor.

_Did I want something to develop over this?_ I might have a **slight** liking to that notion. . . but I knew the possibility was narrow. _Should I pretend it was nothing? _Yup, that is a lot more convenient. Best friends help each other out in tight situations! And that is why Ben decided to um. . eh. . 'kiss' me - without any warning - in order to make that dumb sorry excuse of a brunette understand that he had absolutely no intention to make up with her.

There! Makes sense right!

So for Heaven's sake tell me **WHY **he held me back when I tried to pull away! Why did he kiss me so softly? Why did he hold my face in his hand and the other held me close to him? Why did he do that? To just walk away in the end ?

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**yea. . . so it's short. . . **

**I'm not really sure where to go with this. . but the idea was just stuck in my head. So please message me your ideas and I'll be posting up the next real soon!**

**Thanks guys!  
BB ftw! :)  
**

**~icey  
**


	2. Chapter 2

This was my first break in a long while and I was adamant not to mess this up.

After a long struggle, I managed too move out from my hometown of mediocrity and to live my life. It was tough, yes. To move out of your comfort zone is painful. But being a slave and just nodding your head to whatever you mother has to say is fifty time worse. So, I found myself in Springfield. I worked as an assistant in a book store while trying my luck in other places. The pay was reasonable, I suppose and my co-workers were fun and understanding. An added bonus was all the books which I could read! Free of cost ! But as my luck should have it, I seemed to have come to a stand-still in my life. It was horrible and distressing; not moving forward and remaining stationary. I don't drink a lot, but I do have the occasional shot of vodka when things are just too messed up. It sucked not moving on in life. If I wanted to have the progress and excitement of a tortoise, I could have just stayed home. The urge to punch a hole in the wall was very tempting. But the memory of the painful physio I had to take a few years back as a result of kicking the bed was painful enough to ensure I didn't have an encore.

Seeing that staring blankly at the television set playing some lame soap was utterly pointless, I turned it off and flung the remote on the bean bag. Plopping on the rather sturdy bed, I fished for my headsets underneath the blankets and set to unraveling the mess. Plugging it into my cellphone, I hit play. Injection by Rise Against was on and I enjoyed the fast beats. There's nothing like good rock to ease the frustration, along with a tall glass of Iced Tea, of course. I checked my phone and saw no new messages or calls. I stared at the ceiling despondently. I had contacted a few friends and they said they'd help out. '_What else did you expect?', _I mocked myself. '_Did you actually think they'll go out of their way to help? Even after all these years, you're still being naive.' _ The song had changed to Panic Prone by Chevelle. I drowned myself in the song and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

It was well into the night when I decided to close the book I was engrossed in and leave the store. After locking it securely and double checking it, I left for a nearby cafe. Instead of having my dinner st the cafe itself, I decided to take it home instead. So, after paying for a veal pie and peach flavored Iced Tea, I trudged back to my humble abode. The place wasn't all that bad. It wasn't on top of a small restaurant or near the train station or anything. A decent apartment with a living and a kitchen. I even had my own private bathroom! Fortune was definitely on y side that time.

Feeling rather lonesome, I sunk into my bean bag ans sighed. I was sick of my home. I couldn't meet up with my sister; not until next week when we planned a secret visit. My friends were busy with their happy lives. _"I need to go on a date at least..', _ I thought miserably and threw my head back and stared at the ceiling. Not wanting my pie to go cold, I groped around till my hand found it and tucked in. It was still warm. I got out my laptop and first thing I did was play some songs. 'Evil Angel' by Breaking Benjamin started. A smile crept up my face as I sipped my Iced Tea. I hummed along to my favorite band and opened my mail.

After sifting through some junk mail, I clicked on the mail which will thrust me into a whole new roller coaster ride in my life. My friend Lily, who works at Beckett Media had apparently overheard that a rock band was looking for a PA. She managed to track down the person and had got all the information needed and forwarded it directly to me. That band is one of the bands that had to work their way up to the world stage, before becoming one of the most loved bands.

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**Well, chapter 2 is up. . .  
hope you enjoyed this... I know it's kinda boring; but I just wanted to give a brief intro about our OC here before heading into the main part of the story..  
will update soon!  
~ Icey :)**


	3. Chapter 3

Waking up to your alarm buzzing in your ear is probably the most annoying way to wake up. Period. But today was an important day and I was grateful to the stupid clock for doing it's job. Nervous energy filled me to the brim as I readied myself for the day. A quick shower and I found myself staring at my closet trying to put one and one together to figure out what would be an appropriate outfit to meet the band that will be interviewing me. I pulled out a teal shaded shirt and paired it with my black pants. After my usual fight to tame my hair, I put on some eyeliner and my perfume. Satisfied I grabbed my can of grape juice from the refrigerator and took a swig from it. Fixing myself some bacon strips, I plopped down on my beanie while mentally going through the day's work.

Rob was covering for me at the store.

Check.

Got my rather thin file on my accomplishments, resume and all that embarrassing stuff.

Check.

Recited the small speech I would have to give in order to make myself look like a God-sent to the company.

I wanted to gag at myself... sigh...

Got the address.

Check.

Enough cash?

I checked my wallet... yep, there was just enough to pull me through.

Am I breathing?

Check.

So I gathered myself and headed out to catch the taxi while praying desperately to the Heavens that I get this job. God knows how badly I needed it.. I hope...

* * *

#ping#

I step out off the elevator and my breath catches in my throat. Standing right at the receptionist's desk were the band- Skillet

This is not happening! This is not happening! This is not happening!

As much as I just wanted to turn heel and walk away as if I was merely lost, I gritted my teeth and put on a smile-albeit a little tense- and walked over. ''Um..hello! I was scheduled for an interview today..", I said, unsure who to address it to though. The reactions I received from the small group made my heart sink. They looked sheepish and as if they were searching for the right words to say. The receptionist seemingly decided to be the first to ease me and said in a gentle tone, "Sweetie... I'm really sorry... but we got the position covered... It just happened and.." she looked over to the band trying to get some support, "again, we're really sorry." The air was thick and it seemed like karma was just hell bent to laugh at my face every fucking time I got my hopes up.

"It's cool!", I said, adding a pathetic laugh to cover up my disappointment. "At least I can tell everyone that I met The Skillet,yeah?", I said smiling. An unsure chuckle rose from the group. I was getting tired of the monotonous talk, so I decided to move out,"Well, thanks anyways guys. Keep rocking!". "Why don't you give me your contact number? I'll let you know if we have any other openings.", the receptionist said smiling. "Sure, why not!", I replied gratefully. As I was filling in with the receptionist, Skillet seemed to be discussing something rapidly.

John separated from the group and was talking on the phone. I was about to leave when Korey called me, "Hey! You never gave us your name", she exclaimed. "Lydia Byrne", I told her and we were making small talk. I had the nagging feeling that they were just holding me back for something as Jen was telling me that they are planning on a world tour pretty soon and how she and Seth were dreading it having to spend months together with a married couple.

I noticed that John had joined us now. He caught me looking at him and said, "So Lydia, since you're such a sweetheart I pulled a few strings, made a coupla calls, placed some deals, you know all that undercover work and all" and pushed away Korey who punched him before continuing, "so basically what I'm saying is- you owe me big time! Because I just got you a special interview for Breaking Benjamin", he finished grinning. "You have heard of them right?", Seth asked me, noticing the blank look on my face.

On the inside was a **totally** different story. I was pretty much screaming _'Fuck YES! Breaking Benjamin! THE Breaking Benjamin'_

A wide grin broke across my face as I yelled, "Of course! Oh my word! Thank you so so soo very much John! Oh thank you!". I gave the group a big hug and I was practically glowing. "Just doing my thing", John said with a smirk.

"Guys, I really can't thank you enough. This means so much for me. I can't even begin to tell you how much", I told them again. I was really really grateful that they did something like that for me. "No worries, I think we all deserve a bit of luck", Jen said sportingly. " 'sides there are plenty of chances of bumping into each other!", Seth added.

So after getting a few essential details and thanking Skillet one more time, I left home with a happy feeling that good times were finally coming.

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**AU:**

ok so basically I wanted Lydia to try for Chevelle- who I'm completely obsessed with as well! But Skillet had toured with BB, so I thought Skillet would be the better choice since they have a history with BB and all. Sorry for the long wait but I had some annoying things to care off..namely exams...

So anyways-

**Nike:** the pleasure is mine, m'lady! :D :P :P

**Dragon:** the 1st and 2nd chapter don't have any connection and yes ma'am!

Gosh! you're all such hard task masters :'(

Hope you enjoyed it! :) :)

~Icey


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